The voiceless will sing

The desert and the parched land will be glad;
    the wilderness will rejoice and blossom.
Like the crocus, it will burst into bloom;
    it will rejoice greatly and shout for joy.

Isaiah 35

When I was 20 I spent three months in Israel. I stayed on Mount Carmel. It was our autumn but it was hot and sunny. One day it rained- just a little. And as I went outside the guest house where I was working, I saw that the tiny bit of rain had caused some beautiful small flowers to appear in the sandy earth. 

A little bit of rain brought forth life from dusty earth. 

I recently discovered Isaiah 35. I'm sure I must have read it before, but it felt brand new. (I love that the bible never grows old or stale, no matter how long I read it.) I discovered a wonderful vision of what it will be like when Jesus renews all things.

Imagine a desert, a parched land, a wilderness. Its not hard, just switch on the news. Nigeria under Boko Harem. A refugee camp as big as a city in Syria. The isolated elderly neighbour or the desperation of the person feeding his family from a foodbank. Now apply these verbs: 

Rejoice 

Blossom 

Shout for joy

Be glad

Strengthen the fearful

Why? 

God is coming. 

The wilderness shall be glad; the desert shall rejoice and blossom. Anywhere that is scorched or dry will become a pool of cool refreshing water. This is an image of abundance. Not just a sprinkle of rain and a few small flowers. Whole deserts springing forth with flowers. No more thirst. No more lack. The majesty of mountains given to dry and parched, featureless lands. 

This is what the glory, the majesty of God looks like. 

The next part makes my 'mum to special needs' heart rejoice. The lame will walk. The blind will see. The deaf will hear. The voiceless will sing. Those who can't speak and those with no one to listen, your time is coming. 

Then, a road. A highway. A highway of peace, of safety, of holiness and salvation. A highway full of joyful songs, a highway that leads to God's city. 

I can't wait. 

Good Friday and the big 'God and suffering' question.

Does this question ever go away?

Don't our hearts keep asking, even if we understand with our minds, every time we are faced with it again?

Why does a loving God allow suffering?

Today is the day when we remember the cross. The nails. The death of Jesus.

Suffering is woven into the fabric of the Christian faith. Its at its very heart.

When we ask this question with our hearts turned to him, he meets us.

It matters that our God took on a human body. He had arms that ached and a body that tired. He had hands that bled when the nails went through.

He chose that cross. For me, for you. Instead of me, instead of you.

Today is the day he gave us himself.

We can't tell Jesus he doesn't know what we are going through- because he does.
We can't tell him he doesn't care, because he does.
We can't say he is distant, because he left heaven for us, and went to hell and back for us.

Today is the day that shows that he is the light in every darkness, the light that never goes out.
Today is the day to remind us that he is the everlasting arms.
And coming is the day of glorious light, of glorious hope.

Let him meet you in that place, in that question. Let his love become your comfort, your treasure, your joy, your hope.

Can I ask you a question? What do you want him to give you? Because what he wants to give you is- himself.

'I have loved you with an everlasting love.' Jeremiah 31

'The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms.' Deuteronomy 33

'For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathise with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are- yet he did not sin.' Hebrews 4: 15

Burning bushes

He came into the kitchen one Saturday afternoon and asked 'what does Jesus look like?' He ran to get his bible as I went to get mine.

In Psalm 11 David ends with the phrase 'the upright will see His face.' In the Old Testament to see God's face meant death. But David seems to desire it.

David's faith has scope, it has imagination. He dreams of the seemingly impossible, of truths not yet fully revealed.  He knows that there is depth and richness in the love of our God that we can only begin to explore.. He longs to be face to face with the God he loves.

 I was reminded of this a few weeks ago when Harry arrived in the kitchen that Saturday with his question. He came back with his children's bible open at an illustration and said' 'is it like this?' We compared the description of Jesus in Revelation to the drawing in the book and talked about it for a few minutes.

The tagline of Ann Voskamp's blog is 'there are burning bushes everywhere.' You know the burning bush right? God's presence, holy ground. I felt that holy presence in my kitchen that day, as Harry and I searched for our God's face and longed for him together.

Far too late to even pretend to be a valentines post part 2

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. (1 Corinthians 13)

You know this one. I had to learn it by heart at school for RE GCSE. And it's read at plenty of weddings. So much so it can become overfamiliar and even a little bit stale. 

That's how it has been for me for a while. But the Bible doesn't ever have to become stale. There are many, many passages in the Bible that I can read over and over, just drinking in the beauty of their Author. And I am glad to say that me and 1 Corinthians 13 are making friends. 

If you read this outside of a wedding where people are feeling starry-eyed and romantic it becomes very challenging. And beautiful.

Read it again. It sounds very much like a description of God- the one who is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in love. (Psalm 145)  This is how you are loved. Pretty good, hey? 

Trouble is, Paul is saying that this is how we should love. Read it on an ordinary day, especially after a row or a particularly grumpy morning (who me?) It doesn't sound much like me. Envy is only too familiar, patience all too fleeting. And keeping a record of wrongs? Yep that's all too natural too. 

Growing up as a church-goer and hearing the Bible, but not really knowing God or understanding the true nature of his covenant love, I would read verses such as this one from Matthew: 'you therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect' and feel afraid. How am I ever supposed to do that?

The answer is we don't - Jesus does it for us, in us, through us. These passages make me realise how far I fall short of the standard God holds- perfection- and bring me to where I need to be- at his feet declaring my spiritual bankruptcy and asking for his forgiveness and help. 

One more word about RE GCSE. It's amazing the difference the Holy Spirit makes. I learned that passage at school as an exercise and was not blown away by its brilliance. The Holy Spirit can make the Bible alive if we only let him. I remember one summer day I was working on some RE coursework. I got distracted by reading the book of Acts. I started reading it as I would a novel and got hooked. For the rest of the day I felt different. That memory has stayed with me. That was the first time that I really met God through his book.

Every day is pancake day

Harry had pancakes for breakfast today. He will have them again tomorrow. It's one of the few things he will eat, and as far as he's concerned, a perk of lazier holiday mornings.

A lot of other people ate pancakes today too. And tomorrow we start the fasting, right...?

I grew up giving stuff up for Lent, going to church on Ash Wednesday etc but have been in churches with other traditions for so long now I am out of practice. But I miss it. And I'm not sure what to say to my kids about it.

I know what Lent isn't. It's not a second attempt to keep those resolutions I dropped half way through January. It's not time to go on a diet (that might not be a bad thing but lets face it, there's mini creme eggs in the shops). It's not time to earn a bit of God's favour either.

I've noticed something else. People saying 'don't give something up this year, give out or spread some joy, do something new or something extra.'

Like diets, those are good things, but is there something inherently wrong with giving things up? Something outdated or selfish or pointless?

I want to keep Lent because I want to get ready for Easter. I want a sense of anticipation, for the children as well as myself. I want time to reflect on what it really means. More time to sit with Jesus.

I've set myself some reading to rediscover Lent. I probably will fast from something. I probably won't tell you what it is because that's not the point of it. It might be facebook, it might be chocolate, it might be something else.I will undoubtedly fail at it so if you find me browsing facebook on my phone eating- mini creme eggs- don't be surprised.

Luckily I don't have to earn God's favour. I don't have to earn my place in his kingdom or his heart. He gave up everything for me, gives me his grace everyday. The least I can do is have a stab at giving up a few pleasures to seek to get to know him more.

Jumping on the valentine bandwagon a little too late (part one?)

My Pinterest feed has been full of hearts pretty much since Christmas. Now they are clearing out in favour of shamrocks and rainbows. The done thing for bloggers is to 'do' all the festivals and seasons, presumably to get more pins and readers etc. 

But my little tiny blog isn't setting out to conquer Pinterest and anyway I had nothing to say until now. 

When I think about God's love the verse that springs to mind is this:

'But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.' (Romans 5)

What would our friends think of us if they saw us at our worst moments? Our families see a lot of them but even they don't know it all. What if someone saw every angry or judgemental thought, every selfish impulse? A scary thought. 

Well someone does see it all. And he chose to die for us anyway.

There is a security and relief in knowing that we have been seen at our worst and still loved. And it's not because we are not as bad as we think. If anything, it is this acceptance and love that gives me the courage to look honestly at my own sinfulness. 

And that opens the door to... Well, go and read it for yourself in Romans chapter 5. I can highly recommend Eugene Peterson's translation 'The Message' ( if you don't have it you can read it at biblegateway.com. ) I'll give you a taster:

            'We throw open our doors to God, and discover at the same moment that he has already thrown open his door to us. (The Message, Eugene Peterson, Romans chapter 5.) 

I've called this part one. I may or may not get round to writing part two. I have spared you any pictures of sparkly hearts as I'm sure you've seen enough.

By the way, don't hold your breath for a post on shamrocks and pots of gold from me...

A promise (or two)

Joni Eareckson Tada said that God's children don't live on explanations but on His promises. *

This week during my bible reading two passages have jumped off the page shouting 'Alice' at me. 

        'My frame was not hidden from you when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth.'
(Psalm 139)

This, and in fact the whole psalm, brings a lot of comfort to me as the mum to a child with a genetic disorder. We often read a children's version of this psalm. As we read ' I am wonderfully made, I jump for joy for what you have done', Alice jumps for joy around the room. Good, I want her to know this to be true with all of her heart, body and soul. 

The second passage is from Isaiah. I discovered it when Alice was ill; I read it every day and clung to it. So when it appeared on my kindle today, naturally my thoughts turned to Alice.

Even to your old age and grey hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.
(Isaiah 46:4) 

I walked home today from a meeting with Alice's teacher, turning to God in my mind and wanting to talk to him about her. Then I realised that God had initiated a conversation with me about Alice days ago! And I realised the significance of these two promises together: He was there at the very start of her life, and he will sustain, rescue and carry her till the very end. 

*Diamonds in the dust by Joni Eareckson Tada